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The importance of words


There’s a line of work in the Sober Curious community which is called “sober coaching”.

OK, I guess if I tell you that this is what I do, you’d probably get the idea without too much further explanation, especially if you’ve already done some reading or listened to some podcasts on the subject.  But it’s a really bad job description on two levels. 

Firstly, sober. Who wants to be sober? A quick trawl through Dr Google and we find that suitable synonyms for 'sober' are

'serious, grave, solemn, sedate, staid, sober, earnest, mean, not light or frivolous' [source: Merriam Webster]

Anyone else fallen asleep already?

Secondly, coach. The same source helps us define a coach as one who instructs or trains … especially one who instructs players in the fundamentals of a sport and directs team strategy, and coaching as 'to train intensively (as by instruction and demonstration)'. 

So, honestly, I am neither sober nor a coach.

I am alcohol free, and I will always use this phrase in preference to being sober. I stopped consuming alcohol (but I do obviously still drink, as all creatures must!) in January 2020.

In my role at Red Kites Life, working alongside you as you explore and experiment with your alcohol-free or moderating journey, I am a collaborator, a supporter, a companion, hopefully an inspiration and most definitely a motivator. I am not an 'expert' or an instructor telling you 'how to do it' or directing your strategy. 

I have however built up lots of ideas and experience over the years that will be a valuable resource that you can draw on if you or I think they will help you reach your destination.

In fact my role in your journey will be determined by you, not me. If you want me to motivate you then I will do so. If you want me to be an accountability partner, then I will be there. If sometimes you would benefit from a more assertive conversation to help inspire you when you doubt yourself, I can deliver that when you need it. If you want ideas or support or just someone who understands to listen to your feelings and experiences, I can do that too. 

The whole point is you. Being the best version of you. Being the you that you want to be.  


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